Kilpatrick trial: Drowsy juror's dismissal unexpected - Fox 2 News Headlines

It's confession time.

Deep inside, there was a part of me that secretly hoped that the somnolent juror would give me a call after the Kilpatrick & Co. trial ended so we could get together one night and shut down the City Club.

For those of you without piercings, tattoos or several KB of Front 242, Sisters of Mercy, or My Life With the Thrill Kill Cult on your iPod, that's the Goth institution in the basement of what was once known as the Leland House hotel on Bagley in downtown Detroit.

While I didn't really expect the drowsy juror with the hair dyed a color of red not found in nature to give me a call, I also didn't expect her to get her walking papers less than a day after I wrote about her trouble staying awake five days into a trial that is expected to last four months (but that could very well last five months).

Now I'm not suggesting for a minute that my humble scratchings had anything to do with her dismissal. As far as I can tell, the only reaction Judge Nancy Edmunds has had to these missives is to note that I have a tendency to split my infinitives. That is assuming that her e-mail is theironrobe@hotmail.com.

(If this IS indeed her e-mail account, Her Honor surely wouldn't object to me sharing that she finds my work "contemptible, but not technically contempt." As someone with a pretty mouth who wouldn't last a minute inside, I am grateful for her constructive yet reassuring criticism.)

Legal eagles like my friend and colleague Charlie Langton feel it's outrageous that the Juror Formerly Known as Four couldn't keep her eyelashes from getting tangled for four hours a day.

Still, I can't help feel like some of this falls into the category of blaming the victim.

While defense attorneys like Susan "Snoozin" Van Dusen are through and effective in their cross examination, at times the testimony can get tedious.

Viewed in that light, perhaps our narcoleptic friend should be considered the canary in the coal mine, warning the wise of dangerous conditions below.

At any rate, the only attorney who can fairly claim that they had nothing to do with Juror Number Four's involuntary naps is Michael Naughton, who cross examined an expert on text messaging.

Of course, Number Four was no more by the time Naughton got in the game.

And I'm pretty sure that, after establishing how text messages are recorded, stored and conjured to comply with subpoenas or other requests for their production, my man Mike could have put her into the deepest REM sleep of all.

Follow M.L. Elrick's coverage of the Kilpatrick & Co. trial daily on Fox 2 and at www.myfoxdetroit.com. Contact him at ml.elrick@foxtv.com or via Twitter or Facebook.